Thursday, 21 October 2010

To get me started

They say getting started is the hardest part. Well I hope that's true because I really want this to work. I can't write much as I'm in work, but I wanted to get this blog going and say a big HELLO to you all. My name is Candycan. I am going to take you onwards with me on my journey through life as a person living with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) and my treatment in clinical psychology therapy (If you'd like to come, that is!).

To give you a brief intro, I have been diagnosed with DID now for a year or so, although I am beginning to understand that this has been with me a long time. As we only have the one head, it's difficult to have an insight into what is normal for a person and what is not. Normal for me has always involved having constant chattering from parts of myself going on in my mind; always having more than one opinion on a topic; always feeling like I'm one person one day, another the next. I knew I was not normal in my actions, as I could see such huge variations in my moods/opinions/habits on a day to day basis but I didn't understand why. I thought I had a memory problem. I do have a memory problem, but now I am seeing that this is because I have various personalities who take control at different times and dont always communicate well with each other. OK, that sounds totally crazy, but hopefully you will understand that in fact it's quite a simple and clever way of dealing with some of lifes problems.

I have various, what the pros call 'comorbidities' including depression, eating disorders, problems with self harm, sleeping problems. Sometimes these make life very difficult. Most of the time I feel like I am just about managing to get myself to work and back every day without falling apart completely. Oh the joys!

It has its upsides though. I will introduce you to some of my 'parts'. One is a lovely, happy child who gets great enjoyment out of many little things. You will enjoy reading about them.

For now, I better get on and earn my wage.

If you have any initial comments or questions that'd be great to give me something to get started with next time.

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